May 6th, 2005

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The Joys of Jury Duty

I thought it would be great to actually sit for a day. I never get to sit at work. I'm always running from one thing to another. As it turns out, after five years, I forgot how truly horrible Jury Duty is. After two minutes, my legs cramped. First, we had the joy of listening to Diane Sawyer explain how important what we are doing is. (Does Diane Sawyer serve on Jury Duty? I doubt it and I doubt she really thinks that JD is a wonderful thing.) Then we were told that today is the end of Jury Appreciation week. We were treated to a speech for a Supreme Court Justice and a State Senator. (Okay, when the woman introduced the senator, she didn't know his name. Excuse me? Shouldn't you know that beforehand. I don't favor politicians, but they do deserve some respect.) Back to Jury Appreciation week. They gave out a list of participating vendors that offered discounts. Raffled off a dinner for two at some restaurant and gave out a packet... which included an adorable keychain in the shape of a gavel. Back to Jury Duty... I was called on a case by eleven a.m. And I was not fortunate enough to get called on the first go round of questions. The plaintiff's lawyer looked, I don't know, low rent, compared to the defendant's lawyer who were corporate lawyers. Oh... and one of the lawyers looked like he spent too much time in a tanning salon. When I was finally questioned, I can't stop blessing the $4 million lawsuit against my mother. (These guys used to go around the city bashing into people on purpose and then sued them. It was dismissed but my cynicismfor the civil court system has been ingrained since.) They took me out in the room and grilled my ability to be fair and impartial. I was honest, saying I'd try, but I have my biases. Then I explained that I was a lone middle school librarian. The library was shut in my absence. The students, some from low income families, might not have Internet access, the ability to complete assignments and the ability to borrow reading material when I'm out. They dismissed me. So if I don't have to come back Monday (Yup, sitting here at the courthouse doing this, because the lawyers still have my card) I will go back and kiss my kids... Here's hoping they call me to go home real soon!